Istanbul. The most interesting place I've visited yet. Ancient and modern and all points between. The locals were friendly, even when they weren't trying to sell a guy a carpet. Maybe they were just always angling for the carpet. Good food, good wine, good weather, good views, yes I bought a carpet. Shut up, it's a kilim.
We had discussed before we left how "other people" always seemed to effortlessly meet people and stumble on adventure while travelling, and would it be the same for us. As it turns out, it really is easy. We had booked our first accommodation in a hostel in a room with 4 bunk beds, so we were forced to meet the people we were sharing quarters with, and they all turned out to be lovely.
A funny thing happens to a man when travelling with his wife. In the eyes of other female travelers, he is as good as neutered. Numerous times, Rosie's Mama and I were sought out as companions for female travelers because I was a man with all the benefits and none of the risks. Even if I were the type to wander, women could assume I wouldn't do so in the company of my wife, so, I was the neutered protector. I certainly didn't mind, and I would recommend this strategy to any women travelling in uncertain territory.
So it was then, that after a day of touring the palace and harem of the sultan for a day, two of our roommates invited us along to explore the city and find a "non-touristy" place for dinner. Two charming girls from the opposite side of Canada as ourselves, they had already had a few uncomfortable encounters with unenlightened men that week. We picked a direction and started walking, comparing notes and swapping stories about our first days in the city. We stopped at a little shop with a few tables on the sidewalk and an old man who spoke no English. We couldn't read the menu, but managed to convey that we just wanted some food and drink. He bustled in and out bringing plenty of drinks and rice and salty meat. It seemed like a slow little place until the taxis pulled up.
A large group of 20-somethings came and filled most of the remaining tables. Their leader introduced himself and immediately insisted that we join them. Tables were scraped together and we were now dining with the Ugly King and his crew of entertainers. They were on their way across town to perform at a club. We should come along. Would we like to see a magic trick? Where were we from? Someone in the group produced a guitar, from where I don't know, and started playing Hotel California. We all tried to sing along, but we didn't really know the words. His Ugliness spoke in rhyme most of the time. Of course, my horse. He wore a red silk shirt dangerously unbuttoned and somewhere I have a picture of his Gene Simmons tongue. We laughed and drank and sang there on the sidewalk through the evening.
I don't take my role lightly as the neutered protector. If you agree to be creeper repellent you are probably usually a passive presence, but it may also require action, so don't agree if you are not willing. I was one man with three women, and I could tell Mr Ugly King was trying his level best to determine who I was with without offending me or ruining whatever chances he imagined he had with either of my companions.
Finally, he had to ask. "Which one is your girlfriend?" I smiled and leaned forward, "All of them. I am the sultan!" His friends all laughed, and he looked as excited as if I had offered him one of the girls right there. "Can I be your brother?!" I never did tell him which girl had my leash. We finished our meal, paid too much for it, and found our way back through the old city. As it turns out, adventure isn't that hard to find after all. Just pull up a chair.
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